Will the real Alan Titchmarsh please stand up

I seem to have the habit of being premature, acquired presumably when I arrived into this lifetime two months early. My latest manifestation of this prematurity is that I am currently recovering from what can only be described as an early dose of 'flu. The recovery process seems to involve a great deal of lying on my sofa watching daytime TV. This is probably setting my recovery back by days if not weeks, but what the hell. It's an experience. Yesterday I caught an afternoon talk show hosted by the twinkly Alan Titchmarsh whose day job, as it were, is normally gardening. He didn't look comfortable sat sitting on that sofa. Wellies or a trowel, perhaps might have helped.

According to Alan, iPods, Apple Macs and Aston Martins are among the top ten cool things to own right now. This top ten has been compiled by fashionistas and people who live in Chelsea, apparently. Now these doyens of coolness are also likely to be among the many people who talk about the importance of being authentic. Authenticity being a very cool buzzword for those who are keen on personal development. Not, you understand that being a fashionista or living in Chelsea are prerequisites for an interest in personal development. I live in Westport in Ireland and make my living from moving people swifty along in the personal development stakes. I talk about authenticity a lot. But here's the challenge: define authenticity.

Of course if we take the limited edition print, No 241, complete with Certificate of Authenticity you've just bought, no problemo. We're talking here about its provenance, proof that it is what it says it is. Simple. Personal authenticity is a different ball game. That's open to individual interpretation. Ooooh. Dangerous stuff that.

Most people seem to think that being authentic means being honest, having no pretentions, calling a spade a shovel. That isn't my interpretation. My definition of personal authenticity is: being honest with yourself about who you really are and what you truly feel and being completely comfortable with that. Now this can mean facing up to the fact that for example, you've been trying to fit in with a group of people with whom you have absolutely nothing in common – and that can include members of your own family. The funny thing is that once you admit that to yourself, once you stop trying to fit your square peg into whatever round hole surrounds you, you'll actually start to relate better to those people and they'll start accepting you because you accept yourself. You may never bond completely with them, but you'll stop feeling alone in their company.

Dear old Alan Titchmarsh might be another good example. When he's presenting a gardening programme or padding round historic sites in Britain, he certainly seems to be his authentic self. On yesterday's programme his interest in his guests looked absolutely genuine. He's a good interviewer, intelligent and very charming, so what's the problem? Why did I find myself feeling uncomfortable as I watched? I believe it's because I was picking up on something he's uncomfortable with. Maybe he feels like a square peg in a round hole, who knows? The point is that when we allow ourselves to be authentic we're comfortable and other people are comfortable with us. We step into our power and our lives flow.